Fix Me (previously Fix Them)
by Emerald Pineapple
Summary: Each girl in the literature club has secrets, emotional trauma, and monsters in the closet, sounds fun! Join Monika, Yuri, Sayori, and Natsuki as they try to navigated their lives as teenage girls! An AU, or different scenario of the game by Team Salvato.


A/N: So everyone, I have been on hiatus with this fic because well, a lot has happened. I would be lying if I said I loved what I had before, as it was a mess. I wanted to continue but, a) as I read through what I had before the writing was crap, and b) the amount of plot holes left both you guys and myself confused…I can't tell you what the heck I was thinking when I was like, yeah let me put this online with absolutely no shitting idea what I was doing with the plot. So, without further ado this is the much improved first chapter of Fix Them, and I will be sure to have the next chapter up soon. If not, I welcome you to berate me and my lateness, after all this time that is the last thing you people deserve.

Much Love,

Emerald Pineapple

Trigger warning for depression, suicidal and self harming thoughts/tendencies

This amazing game and these characters are the work of Team Salvato and do not belong to me whatsoever, I'm just taking the emotional roller coaster that is Doki Doki literature club and continuing it.

—

We all live in sin, some of us are just more shameless than others.

—

Monika had stop questioning the morality of her situation long ago, if not she risked going insane. If she stopped to question where her world was going than she would start to question if her motives were selfish, or if she should really let the boy pick which girl he really wanted. But if she did, she would lose all the progress she had made, all the mental breaking she's done on the other three girls.

It wasn't easy, every time she broke the girls, she felt part of herself falling, leaving her. Now she felt like a shell of a girl. But that was okay, because he was going to be hers. He was going to be her's and only her's. Forever. That's all that mattered.

Sayori was going to be out of the picture soon, making her break was easier than the other girls, that's why she was going first. For Monika, less than a glance at her character file was enough to pinpoint Sayori's point of weakness.

 _The room was white, with a wood trim around the walls edges, along with a matching hardwood floor. Even though there were no windows, light seemed to pour from every nook and cranny, making the room brighter than it should have been. The small room seemed to hum with an unnatural energy. The only other things in this room was four simple doors representing each girl._

 _Monika faced two, having left one of the two doors on the other side of the room. Each door was labeled with the name of a girl from the Literature Club, and it was very easy to distinguish each door from each other, even without names on them. Monika walked towards the bubble gum pink door with kitty stickers on it and reached for the handle._

 _"_ _Ow!" Monika cried, having touched the handle and felt it burn the flesh of her hand after trying to open it._

 _She cursed at herself under her breath for being so stupid. Of course, she should have expected this, no way would the other girls have no idea what is going on. Monika held her injured hand to her stomach, feeling blisters already begin to form on the pads of her fingers and the palm of her hand. She hissed as the pain deepened, sending a buzz through her head until she retreated back to her door._

 _"_ _Leave Monika!" A small voice yelled from behind the closed door._

 _"_ _Oh Sayori, let me in, we used to be so close, but since that boy's arrival, I never see you!"_

 _"_ _Don't try to fool me Monika, I know what you're like, I know what you want." Sayori called back, this time sounding closer to the door._

 _Good. She's interested._

 _"_ _Sayori, you're the one pushing me away, you're the one doing the hurting-"_

 _"_ _Don't play games with me Monika!"_

 _Sayori's voice cracked, Monika smirked. She was getting closer._

 _"_ _No games, I just wanted to check on you, I've never seen you so isolated, I'm worried."_

 _Play the empathic card, make her think you care._

 _The door started to open, Sayori's fingers creeped through a crack in the door, beginning to push it open._

 _That was her chance. She was stronger than Sayori, it really was no competition._

 _Monika grabbed the edge of the door and flung it open with all the strength she had._

 _Sayori screamed and tried to push the door closed, but she was no match for Monika._

 _She didn't scream for long._

 _Monika didn't want the other girls to know too much._

 _—_

It was her depression, those were her demons hiding in the closet. Each girl had them. If you dug just a small bit inside her character file, it was clear how much of the strawberry blonde's life was surrounded by depression. It was weird, when Monika went into her character file, she found Sayori's room. That wasn't the weird part though, the weird part was how, one glance casually around the room and you found a typical Japanese girl's room. Manga on the bookshelf, action figures from her favorite animes, clothing strewn on the floor, and stuffed animals crowding the bed. Yet something was off. When Monika entered the room, the hair on her arm stood on end and she felt…inbalanced. Looking closer, the club president could see a small film of depression that coated everything. It was everywhere. It was smoky. No one could breathe in it for very long.

With Sayori gone now, there was no one who could put up a facade of what was really happening.

It no longer scared Monika what he would think, no matter how he saw her, he couldn't choose anyone else, he was the only out for her.

The only way out of this hellish purgatory, no matter if she truly loved him.

—

Sayori felt a change the moment she sat up. She couldn't place how it happened, but it was there.

At the age of eleven, Sayori was diagnosed with depression. Every physical check up at the doctors office now required her to answer a packet containing questions like: Do you feel like everyone would be better off without you? How many day a week on average do you have dark thoughts? Do you ever have suicidal thoughts and/or tendencies? And always, she would answer in the same row of boxes. Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, the scratch of the pen would always echo in an eerie sound, as if she was doing something wrong by being truthful about her depression. Inside an examination room, she would sit on the same table, and tear at the protective parchment paper the nurses would place down to stop germs from spreading.

Sayori felt like a germ, an enigma in people's lives.

This was her norm, go to doctors check ups, fill out a packet, take the pills, and keep her thoughts at bay. It wasn't terribly hard most of the time with the help of her medicine, but today, this horrid Monday, was different for the pink haired girl. Maybe it was just a bad day, but none of her bad day's had even been this oppressive. Her chest felt like it was being crushed, horribly crushed by everything wrong with her.

—

The tension in the literature club was so thick, it could be cut by one of Yuri's knife's.

One of her favorite one's perhaps, with a polished handle made of walnut and a blade shaped in a beautiful arch ending in one small point. Whenever she pressed it into her finger, the blood would surge around the silver and stain the knife. Yes…that would be the perfect knife…

"Yuri?!" Natsuki yelled, bring the violet haired girl out of her daydreams.

"Huh?" Yuri looked up from her book she had not really been reading, instead, just staring at.

She then looked up at Natsuki, which wasn't hard. Even though the aggressive girl was eighteen like the rest of the girls, she was short enough to be about twelve. Though Yuri didn't understand why Natsuki was so small, she also knew Natsuki didn't show any indication as to what it could be. Really if anything, Natsuki had a ridiculous amount of pent up anger and aggression, though everyone else assumed it was done in defense for her small size.

And, Yuri found her adorable, to her absolute horror. It was bad enough that Yuri liked girls (her most closely guarded secret), but it also had to be that she was crushing super hard on the one girl who finds her insufferable? It was like one of those mangas Natsuki found so wonderful.

"Have you seen Ari anywhere?" Natsuki almost demanded.

Ari, the clueless boy Sayori dragged to the club and showed as much interest in writing as Natsuki has in reading Yuri's favorite horror novel, which is less to nothing. So far, Yuri wasn't very impressed by his writing prowess. Neither was Natsuki, to her joy. Though it was very unlikey, it left some hope that Natsuki liked her back. Then again, that was probably because he wasn't very impressed by her poem and she was enraged at him.

Thinking to it, the past couple of days Ari had been at the literature club had been some of the worst in terms of conflicts. Monika was constantly at Sayori's throat, which meant anytime Sayori tried to talk to Ari for a period longer than two minutes, Monika would join their conversation.

"Sayori and him left for home about five minutes ago." Yuri told her calmly.

Natsuki responded by biting her soft lips and saying,

"I was supposed to give him the next novel in my manga series…"

"There's always tomorrow," the tall girl sighed.

Over on the other side of the classroom, Monika listened to their conversation while pretending to read a book.

 _Yes, there's always tomorrow for him to set things right._


End file.
